The Horrible Thing About Smeagols

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The horrible thing about Smeagols
  Is Smeagols are horrible things.
Their eyes they are made out of lanterns (my Precious)
  Their hair it is made out of strings.

Thievesie, Sneaksie, Tricksy, Precious,
  Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine!

But the most horrible thing about Smeagols
  Is their Precious for which they pine.

Well, that and the throttling, and the eating raw meat, and the treachery,
and….

— J.R.R. Milne, The Mount at Doom Corner

(Well, really, Ian Hamet and myself….)

3 thoughts on “The Horrible Thing About Smeagols”

  2. Pray what is the matter with filet of trout?
    When eaten at once it’s delish
    Crappie and small mouth and big mouth bass
    Nothing as good as raw fish

    Eel is the slippery one I adore
    It wriggles through many tight things,
    Like crevices, cracks and key-holes of doors
    But also through golden rings

    Now if you had one, which if you put on
    You could catch many fish without trouble,
    You could eat up your fill from midnight to dawn
    And then disappear like a bubble

    Ring of most precious adorable power
    Ring of my breakfast and lunch
    Ring of the wraiths and Ring of the Tower
    Ring of my favorite munch

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  3. You know, Smeagol really needs to be sent to live with some Japanese elves. Give him three squares a day of sashimi and nori, and he’d be okay in no time. 🙂

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