Spirited Away, by Miyazaki Hayao

In his lesser known story
Smith of Wooton Major, J.R.R. Tolkien
has much to say about the land of Faerie, much that’s been mostly
forgotten by modern purveyors of fantasy. Faerie is, of course, the land
of the Fair Folk, the Fairies, a dangerous breed about as unlike
Tinkerbelle as it is possible to be. Faerie lies “beyond the fields we
know” as Lord Dunsany said in
The King of Elfland’s Daughter; a man might wander all his
days the wild world over and never enter its halls, or he might find it
in the forest over the hill.

The essence of Faerie is that it is not for mortal men, though mortals
might stray there. It is a perilous realm, where man or woman might
meet their death, or find their heart’s desire never to find it again.
It has its rules, but they are not for mortals to know; and often they
change capriciously from place to place and from person to person. It is
a place where almost anything can happen and in which few things can be
explained–a place of high fantasy.

Ironically, few fantasy authors have spent much time there. This is
largely Tolkien’s own fault; he was a painstaking systematizer, and
The Lord of the Rings consequently has little of Faerie in it.
(The Blessed Realm of Valinor, the land of the Valar, has a stronger
flavor of Faerie, in that mortals are forbidden to enter it, but even
Valinor is too well mapped and understood to be truly a part of the
Perilous Realm.) Tolkien’s followers have written many books ostensibly
set in Faerie and featuring such luminaries as Oberon and Titania and the
Puck, but even this is no guarantee of success. Faerie has best been
captured, in my reading, by George MacDonald and
Lord Dunsany. H.P. Lovecraft
knew something of its darker
corners, and Neil Gaiman might well be a changeling.

I’ve often written about my notions of the Big Story and the Small Story.
It’s the nature of Faerie that stories about that realm are necessarily
Small Stories, concerned with the fate of individuals rather than the
fate of worlds. And this is a good thing, for individuals are as varied
as snowflakes, whereas systematized fantasy worlds are driven by the
demands of narrative causality into a dreadful sameness.

Over at Banana Oil, Ian Hamet has
recently begun a series of essays about his favorite film makers–the
ones he considers to be absolutely top-tier. And the first essay in the
series concerns Japanese animator Miyazaki Hayao (or Hayao Miyazaki, as
he more usually called here in the West). Now, I know about as much
about Japanese animation as you can fit in a thimble without removing
your finger; I figure reading Ian’s essay just about doubled my knowledge
of the subject. But I was intrigued: here’s a maker of cartoons, for
goodness sake, and Ian ranks him as one of the greatest film makers in
history. I can’t even dismiss Ian as an anime bigot, because (IIRC)
Miyazaki is the only animator on the list.

It so happens that Miyazaki’s latest film, Spirited Away,
just won an Academy Award over Lilo and Stitch (a movie I
love); that Spirited Away was seen in this country largely due
to the efforts of John Lasseter, the genius behind
Toy Story and Monsters, Inc. and a man whom I
greatly respect as a storyteller; and that Spirited Away has
just been released on DVD.

As I say, I was intrigued; and so last week I went out and got a copy.
And last night, after the kids were in bed, I slipped it into the DVD
player, and pressed “play”, and…stepped into Faerie.

It’s a Japanese-flavored Faerie, mind you, with Japanese names and Japanese
architecture, and Japanese spirits, but Faerie nonetheless. And it’s a
stunningly beautiful place.

The story is, in one sense, an old one. A young woman’s beloved is
captured by the Queen of Faerie; she steals him back at great risk to
herself, defeating the Queen of Faerie in the process. In Miyazaki’s
vision this tale is transformed. The young woman becomes a spoiled,
petulant young girl; the beloved becomes the girl’s parents; and the
Queen of Faerie is a witch who runs a bathhouse where the gods of Japan
come to be refreshed. The girl enters Faerie in the usual way: by
accident. She and her parents are driving to their new home–

I must digress for a moment. The movie is set in Japan. The food is
Japanese; the signs are in Japanese; the cars drive on the left side of
the road. How come the girl and her parents look caucasian? But anyway–

She and her parents are driving to their new home, and take a wrong turn
down a dirt road. They come to a high wall pierced by a long dark tunnel;
the tunnel entrance is guarded by a stone idol. Despite the girl’s
misgivings, they walk through the tunnel and into another place, and
therein hangs the tale. I could go on, but it wouldn’t avail me
anything–much of the allure and the delight of the film lie in details that are
wholly unexplained.

To say that I’m impressed by Spirited Away would be an
understatement. Most animated features (including Pixar’s excellent
films) are children’s stories; by comparison, Spirited Away
has the stuff of a full-fledged novel; it’s kid stuff only in that the
main character is a young girl, and the movie contains no sex to speak of.
Oh, and it’s about courage, fortitude, love, and personal integrity,
instead of the more “adult” themes of cynicism, disillusionment, and
despair.

I really can’t do this film justice. I’m no film buff, nor am I a
student of Japanese animation; and any attempt I’d make to describe the
beauty of the background paintings would be doomed to failure. You’d
have to watch it for yourself.

So go find a copy and watch it. I’m looking forward to seeing it again,
and I dearly wish I’d seen it in the theater. And I’ll definitely be
looking for other Miyazaki titles.

The Children of the Storm, by Elizabeth Peters

A Disclaimer up front: This review is NOT going to include any kind of
plot description. The book is in hardback and I have 3 co-workers who
will hurt me if I give away the plot before they get the book.

This is the next installment of the Amelia Peabody series. It’s great. If
you have the cash and can’t get it due to waiting lists in the library, go
and get it. Otherwise, I guess you’ll have to wait for paper.

The Golden One, by Elizabeth Peters

This is the most recent Amelia Peabody mystery but one, just fresh out in
paperback. Deb English gets them from the library in hardcover, so she
reviewed this one quite some time ago, and I’m afraid I’m too lazy to
look up what she said.

But anyway, I liked it. Parts of it were purely absurd (if very much in
keeping with the traditions of the series), and over all I think it’s the
best of the most recent few episodes. All the familiar players are
there, and there’s considerable obfuscation, and the bad guys get what’s
coming to them, and so forth.

If you’re not familiar with Amelia Peabody, this is not the book to start
with; go to our Elizabeth
Peters
page and find out more.

“Oh, the Humanity!”, Take Two

“OH, THE HUMANITY!” Take Two: As everyone knows but me (where
“everyone” means the two people who wrote me), the phrase “Oh, the
humanity!” dates back to at least 1937. Iam Hamet of
Banana Oil put it this way:

The earliest instance of it I ever encountered was the radio broadcast from the
Hindenberg disaster when the commentator, at a loss for words and with genuine
anguish cried out this
very phrase.
His reflexive usage makes me think it was a common phrase at the time.

Thanks also to Lynn Sislo, who’s 99% sure the reporter was Edward R. Murrow.
She’s got a blog called
Reflections in d
minor
which
I’ll be taking a look at.

Update: Alas, the 1% case came up. According to Stasia, the
reporter’s name is Herbert Morrison; she cites
this site.

“Oh, the Humanity!”

Has anybody tracked how the expression “Oh, the
humanity!” because a cliche cry of horror and dismay? I first heard it,
so far as I can recall, maybe five years ago, and I assumed that it was a
silly riff on “Oh, the inhumanity!” If anybody has any ideas
please e-mail me, as I’ve been curious about this for some time.

But any way, I’m crying “Oh, the humanity!” because Jane’s new computer
arrived today, and naturally it runs Windows XP, and I’m the guy who gets
to set it up.

For the last six or seven years, Jane’s been using a Gateway desktop
machine. It was bought as “our” computer, and was pretty ritzy when it
was new; at that time, it had the best graphics hardware I’d ever seen.
Jane used it for personal finance and her tax accounting work; I used it
for games, digital photography, and programming projects. We both used
it for the Internet. Then I got a laptop and started doing almost
everything but Internet access from it. And then three years later I
replaced it with another laptop, which I now have, and about six months
ago I started doing all of my Internet access from it. Meanwhile, Jane’s
had this crufty old desktop Windows 98 desktop with all sorts of garbage
installed on it, and lots of stability problems.

So, in the interests of conserving space, we ordered her a laptop,
and it arrived today.

Windows XP is better than I feared, in most ways; it’s certainly more
tractable than Windows ME. And the machine’s power blows mine out of the
water; it’s pretty sweet.

But there’s a bad apple in every barrel, and the bad apple showed up when
I started trying a copy my collection of digital photos (family
snapshots, mostly) from my laptop to hers…or, more precisely, from the
backup CDs I’ve been burning to her computer. Every so often it would
find a file on the CD that it simply wasn’t willing to read. I put the
same CD in my old machine, and was able to load the erring files…but the
picture was corrupted in each case. So either the CD was bad to begin
with, or the new laptop’s CD drive was damaging it. The new laptop’s
drive is a CDRW drive, so the latter is possible, but it seems really
unlikely. So I grabbed a couple more CDs I’d burned and checked those;
they had problems too. Ouch.

I ended up copying the pictures from one laptop to the other, 100 MB at a
time, swapping my external Zip drive back and forth.

All this left me with a question: was it the old drive, the new drive, or
the cheap CDR media I’d been using? So I decided on an experiment. I
took an unused CDR from the spindle, and burned a disk full of photos
using the new laptop’s CDRW drive. Then I attempted to copy the contents
back onto the new laptop’s hard disk. It didn’t work! The disk I
had just burned was unreadable. OK, says I; I found an unused
Verbatim-brand CDR I’d gotten ages ago, and tried it again. It got
about a third of the way through the disk, and hung there. I had to
reboot the machine just to extract the bad CD. Interesting, no?

That, by the way, is my primary complaint about the new machine and OS so
far–it doesn’t cope with CD problems very well. Of course, if the CD
drive itself is faulty then it’s not entirely Windows XP’s fault if it
doesn’t behave properly.

Now, the Verbatim discs are pretty old; they are 74 minute discs while the
current standard is 80 minutes; it’s possible (though scary) that they’ve
degraded over time. Also, some peculiar things had happened with the
first disc, and I hadn’t rebooted. I decided, I could easily afford to
destroy another disc, so I rebooted and tried it again.

It recorded just fine, so far as I could tell.

I put the new disc in my old machine, and copied its contents to the hard
disk. No problems–but then, the new machine had been noticing problems
the old one didn’t. So I put the new disc back in the new machine, and
again copied its contents to the hard disk. My hope was that it would
find a bad file, and that checking that file against the copy I’d just
made onto the old machine’s hard disk would reveal that the new laptop’s
drive was eating CDs. Then I’d know where I stood.

It worked perfectly.

So now I don’t know where I stand, and it’s getting late. More tomorrow,
probably.

Maskerade, by Terry Pratchett

I like Pratchett’s books. I especially like the Witch series he writes.
They crack me up.

This one has Nanny Ogg and Granny Weatherwax looking for a third witch to
replace Magrat, now Queen of Lancre. It’s the maiden-mother-crone
requirement for having a coven. The most likely candidate for maiden,
Agnes Nitt, who calls herself Perdita because it sounds so much better
than Agnes, has gone to Ankh Morpokh to find herself. After a series of
false starts, she finds herself in the chorus of the Opera. And of
course the Opera house has a ghost with a white mask who unfortunately
has taken to killing folks. And Agnes is extremely, well, large but
sings like a diva, so Pratchett gets to get in all sorts of fat lady
jokes. And then there is the fake Italian Opera Star who eats constantly.
And Nanny Ogg has written a cookbook called “The Joy of Snacks” that
has recipes guaranteed to make your blood boil and other parts heat up
nicely. It’s sold tons of copies with virtually no money coming back to
Nanny Ogg so Granny Weatherwax takes the matter in hand and they go to
see the publisher, in Ankh Morpokh, of course. And they take Nanny’s cat
Greebo along who in times of stress morphs into a man, unfortunately
naked. And there is the delightful scene where Granny plays poker with
Death to save the life of a child and cheats to win. And then does some
chiropractic work on his arm bones that are tired from swinging the
scythe. In order to get Agnes back to Ramtops they have to work out who
the Ghost of the Opera is and why he is killing people. And it goes from
there.

None of that is any kind of order from the book. Pratchett books are
often hilarious vignettes tied together with a funny plot line. This one
was good. Especially the ending. I really liked the ending.

The Conspiracy

I’ve written a number of short stories over the
past few years, along with a couple of novels. I’ve decided that it’s
time to let them see the light of day, and so I’m going to publish them
here on my website, on a new page called [hlink “Once-Told Tales”].
I’ll be adding them slowly, over time, and as I add each new piece I’ll
announce it here.

The first story is a little tale of revenge called
The Conspiracy. Have fun.

Captain Underpants and the Attack of the Talking Toilets, by Dav Pilkey

This book, being “The Second Epic Novel” about Captain Underpants,
arrived in my home, along with four or five others, whilst I was in
Australia. I want this to be perfectly clear–my sister is responsible,
not me. Jane read “The First Epic Novel”,
The Adventures of Captain Underpants, to David while I was
gone; I got to read him the concluding chapters of the second volume on
my return.

The series is really about two boys who can’t sit still in class–the
kind who are clever, easily bored, and always able to make their own fun.
In the first book, so I gather, they write a comic book about a character
named Captain Underpants–the first superhero to wear jockey shorts
instead of longjohns. He has “wedgie power”. Along the way, they
hypnotize the school principle, Mr. Krupp, into thinking that he’s
Captain Underpants. When anyone snaps their fingers, Mr. Krupp will
divest himself of his outer clothes and his hair piece, and rush off to
fight evil wearing only his underpants and a cape.

In this volume, our heroes use an old copier revamped as a Science Fair
exhibit to try to make copies of their latest comic book. To their
dismay, the evil beings therein (the Talking Toilets) come to life and
ravage the school, eating all of the students and faculty (including the
delightfully named Miss Anthrope, Ms. Ribble, and Mr. Meaner). They save
the day by feeding the toilets the food from the school cafeteria.

The book is clear aimed at the beginning reader. Above all, it’s short.
The book is short, the chapters are short, and the pages are short.
The writing is breezy and fast-paced, and Dav Pilkey undeniably has a
lock on what small boys find amusing, and he manages to (mildly)
entertain the adult reader as well.

Which is just as well, as I’ve got several more of these in my
future–both David and James were in stitches.

Stop the Presses

If you’re like most people, you’ve gotten at
least one of those African Scam e-mails. They mostly read like this (I
paraphrase):

Hi, I’m related to somebody who
has been looting my small, underdeveloped nation and stashing the money
abroad, and I want my share; if you’ll just give me information about
your bank account I’ll funnel it through there and leave you a
ridiculously large sum as a gratuity!

This roughly translates as:

Hi, if you’re stupid enough to give me your account
information, I’ll take all your money!

Originally they all seemed to come from Nigeria, but they’ve evolved
since then; now they come from all over Africa and other third-world
locations. But today I got one with features
I’ve never before seen: it’s formatted neatly, with appropriate use of
upper and lower case.

Somebody notify the New York Times.